E's Birth Story

Now that I have my new hands free pumping bra in the mail, I have a few minutes to myself (pumping counts as my personal time now) to share E's birth story. This will be long as fuck.

Monday, January 12th
9:30 AM: Monday started out like every other Monday during the past month. I woke up and headed into my OB's office for my weekly check-up. I was 39 weeks 1 day. I'd been ~90% effaced and 3 cm dilated for weeks and had been using Evening Primrose Oil for one week, so I was hoping for a bit of progress. Nothing. Everything was the same. My doctor again said that I was looking great, that baby was low and ready to go and that she didn't expect to see me for my next appointment. We did schedule a 40 week check-up and an NST just in case. My favorite nurse recommended that we continue to take long walks and have sex.

8:00 PM - 12:00 AM: So we did. About five minutes later, I started feeling period-like cramps that I was pretty sure were coming in waves. I just laid in bed quietly for a little bit before saying anything to Seth. Around 10:00, I told Seth that I was having contractions and that we should start timing them. I was really anxious about A) making sure it wasn't a false alarm and B) making sure we got to the hospital in time to get the antibiotics for the GBS. Once I figured out how to time them correctly, I realized they were coming every 4 minutes and lasting one minute. I called my mom in Philly and she insisted that I go to the hospital immediately. I decided to take a shower instead - I wanted to be as fresh as possible during L&D - but once I was in there I felt like the contractions were really coming more quickly and getting stronger. I hurried up and told Seth that we needed to leave right away. We grabbed our bags, kissed our pups good-bye and headed to the hospital!

Tuesday, January 13th 12:30 AM - 1:45 AM: By the time we got into triage, the contractions were getting stronger and I couldn't talk through them, but I managed. I remember staring at a yellow sign and just breathing through them quietly. The whole time this was happening, Seth was watching the monitor. Every time a contraction would start, his face would light up and he'd tell me that another one was coming. No shit. Part of me wanted to punch his smiling face, but mostly I just laughed. We're scientists - we love data. I knew I'd be doing the same thing if our positions were reversed. When the triage nurse finally gave me the most painful pelvic exam I have ever experienced (I was 100% sure that I wanted an epidural at this point), I was still about 90% effaced but dilated 5 cm. We were admitted and sent to a labor room!

2:00 - 6:00 AM: In the labor room, my contractions got really bad. The only thing that helped was holding on to Seth and rocking back and forth. Soon they started drawing my blood and prepping me for the epidural and I actually started to doze off which was awesome. Next came the epidural. This was by far my least favorite part of the whole experience. It is a really weird feeling. You just shouldn't feel pressure in your spine like that. It freaked me the fuck out (they need to invent an epidural for an epidural) . Luckily, they were able to get it in okay and soon I was happy and ready to get some sleep. Which I sort of did. My blood pressure was measured every 15 minutes and I had to go on an oxygen mask for most of the night (turns out E didn't like me being on my left side), but I did get some rest. Seth slept great.

6:00 AM: The nurses came in and checked me - I was only at 7 cm! WTF. It had been four hours since my last check. They told me that my doctor, Dr. F, would be in around 8:00 to check me again and decide what we were going to do. By the way, my doctor only delivers on Tuesdays. I was so pumped that I went into labor on the one day that she would actually be there. It really worked out perfectly.

8:00 AM: Dr. F arrived and it's the same story - I was only dilated 7 cm. I can't remember what we did at this point. More waiting I think. More ice chips. The most delicious ice chips I had ever tasted.

9:00 AM: My parents arrived!  They got on a 7:00 AM flight expecting to have a grandson when they landed in Florida, but that's not what happened. I'm so glad that they made it here in time. It was really nice to have them there. They were able to hang out in my room with us for awhile. Epidurals are awesome. It was like I wasn't in labor at all.

9:45 AM: Dr. F checked me again and told me that I was at 9 cm and she broke my water. We also arranged my bed so that I was sitting up in order to get the baby to move down so more. My doctor said she wanted me to hang out in that position for a few hours so that when it was time to push, the baby would just come right out. She told me that she'd be back at noon, but if I felt like I was "holding in a giant shit", I should tell the nurses so they could let her know that it was time. Yes, those were her exact words. If you know me at all, you know that I couldn't have found a more perfect doctor for me.

11:30 AM: I sent my parents to go get something to eat and around 12:00 Dr. F popped in to see how I was doing. I told her I didn't feel any different, but she decided to check me before she went to pick up her daughter (another IVF baby). Thank God she did. She said I was at 10 cm and ready to go. The next thing I know, she's calling the nurse back in and they're rearranging my bed and getting me into position to push. Despite being in labor for over 12 hours, it all seemed like it happened so fast!

12:00 PM: This next part was so much better than I ever expected it would be. It was just Seth, my doctor, a nurse and a nursing student in the room with me. My doctor had Seth and the nurse each hold one of my legs (Seth didn't expect that - I think he was pretty nervous at this point!). She actually sat in bed with me and started coaching me on how to push. We were going to push for 3 sets of 10 seconds at each contraction. We did two practice rounds before getting started. It took me two or three tries to get the hang of it, but within five minutes Seth and my doctor were telling me that they could see the baby's head (I didn't want to look). Seth was awesome. If he was still nervous, he didn't show it. He kept telling me what a great job I was doing and kept me calm and motivated. After another two or three rounds of pushing, Seth told me that the baby was almost out, that we were so close!

12:20 PM: All of a sudden, Dr. F told me to put my hands "in the middle". I had no idea what the fuck she meant, so finally someone grabbed my hands and I felt something kind of warm and squishy and Dr. F told me to pull my baby out. What?? I wasn't expecting that either. But I did it and I'm glad that I did. I reached down, grabbed under his arms and pulled my little E out into the world. This is when I finally opened my eyes. I took one look at him and started laughing and crying and reaching for him. He was perfect. He was everything I always imagined. He was mine.

They laid E on my chest for a few minutes which was amazing. They had to take him away for a bit to do some more suctioning because he was coughing a lot. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. They brought him back briefly, but had to take him away again because my doctor was stitching up a minor tear (not even close to as bad as I had imagined) and then they had to deal with some extra bleeding. They gave me a shot to help with that and then Dr. F had to stick her hand up my vag and dig around a bit, but eventually they got it under control.

The whole time this was going on,  I just wanted to hold E so badly. It felt like forever before they brought him back even though it was probably more like 10 minutes. Finally, we were ready for each other and we got to spend more skin-to-skin time together and we started breastfeeding (more on that later). It was amazing. I can't even describe the happiness, the relief, the disbelief that I felt seeing and holding my son for the first time. I don't want to ever forget that feeling. The other thing that I don't ever want to forget is the look on Seth's face when he saw his son for the first time and they way he followed him around the room. He kept looking back at me and I know he was thinking the same thing as me - He's real, he's perfect, he's mine.

So that's how little E was born. I feel like I had the perfect labor and delivery experience for me and I'm very grateful for that because I know that so often things don't work out that way. I know how lucky I am to have had such a wonderful experience and to have such a healthy little boy. I'm trying to focus on that during the rough moments - and there have been TONS of rough moments during these first two weeks. That will be the topic my next post...Hell Week.

39 weeks - ONE!!

How far along: 39 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: One week/7 days!!!

Baby is the size of a: Watermelon. We had a growth scan this week and they estimated that he weighs about 7 pounds 3 ounces.

Physical symptoms: Just generally sore and uncomfortable plus chapped crotch from taking evening primrose oil. Oh and heartburn.

Mood: Ugh. Yesterday was terrible. The chapped crotch just got to be too much. The diaper rash cream just wasn't cutting it. I felt so bad because I was getting so annoyed with Seth simply because he was happy and I was not. I did NOT take the EPO last night. My doctor recommended it, but she also says that it's really important to do whatever you need to do to stay in a good place mentally. Diaper rash was doing nothing good for my mental state.   

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  I don't know. I imagine more than +25, but I really don't want to find out.

Maternity clothes: Yes, plus yoga pants and some of Seth's clothes. I look awesome.    

Sleep: Still decent

Best moment of the week: Seeing Baby E at the growth scan. Next time I see him, he'll be an outside baby!

Movement: Still wild

Food cravings/aversions: Nothing in particular. I did buy a six pack of beer though. To be enjoyed after Baby E is born, of course.

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Same as last week. I may have had some very mild real contractions last night, but they didn't last or wake me up and I haven't felt any today (just the BH). I will be so annoyed if the motherfucking EPO hasn't done anything to my cervix. It probably hasn't it. I only used it six days.

What I miss: Not having a fire crotch.

What I am looking forward to: Not having a fire crotch. And Baby E's due date!

Milestones: Baby E is considered full term today! 

Showing yet: Please excuse my "outfit". I'll put pants on eventually, but you know how I feel about real clothes on Sundays. 

38 weeks -TWO!!

How far along: 38 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: Ahhh!! Two weeks/13 days

Baby is the size of a: Pumpkin

Physical symptoms: Uncomfortable and sore - lots of pelvic/hip pain - but it's not terrible.    

Mood: Pretty good!   

Total Weight Gain/Loss: No change since last week. I think I'm about +25. 

Maternity clothes: Still mixing maternity and regular, still favoring PJs and yoga pants.      

Sleep: Not bad. I'm back to peeing every hour and sometimes I think of something that keeps me up for awhile.

Best moment of the week: My sister booked a last minute flight to visit me so that has been awesome. 

Movement: I think he finally made his way around to facing my back which is the "ideal" position. His feet are now kicking out my right side and his butt is always popping out around my belly button.

Food cravings/aversions: Nothing in particular.

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Prelabor: No change - still ~90% effaced and 3 cm dilated. Despite this progress, my doctor still recommends taking Evening Primrose Oil so I'll give it a shot.

What I miss: Getting out of bed or out a chair on my own and without pain.

What I am looking forward to: We have our last growth scan on Thursday so I'm looking forward to seeing my inside baby one more time!

Milestones: This Sunday, baby will be 39 weeks - full term! I can't believe it. 

Showing yet: I feel giant. 

37 weeks - THREE!!

How far along: 37 weeks (and 1 day) 

Countdown to EDD: 3 weeks/20 days

Baby is the size of a: Winter melon. Baby E is considered early-term now! He's still practicing sucking, breathing, swallowing and things like that. He's probably between 6 and 7.5 lbs now (based on my last growth scan).

Physical symptoms:  Very tired, often irritable and usually uncomfortable  

Mood: Fine - I'm just really excited!   

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  No change since last week

Maternity clothes: What a pain in the ass. It's so hot here, but none of my warm weather maternity clothes fit anymore. I'm too lazy and too cheap to buy new clothes at this point, so I'm mostly wearing yoga pants and PJs. Oh! Nursing bras are totally amazing though.   

Sleep: Not too bad. I think I only peed twice - TWICE - the other night! Sometimes I wake up and having trouble shutting my mind off and getting back to sleep though.

Best moment of the week: I'm supposed to say Christmas, but honestly the best moment was waking up to an empty house (meaning just me, Seth and the pups) this morning.

Movement: Still wild, still trying to spin around but I think it's been unsuccessful.

Food cravings/aversions: Nothing new

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Prelabor signs: As of last Wednesday, I was 80% effaced and dilated 2 cm. Our families are convinced that I'll have the baby early, but I don't feel anything yet. It's a little frustrating that everyone thinks that because...I don't know it just feels like a lot of pressure having everyone waiting like this.

What I miss: Beer and a cold turkey hoagie - this will be my "first meal". Okay, maybe the beer will have to wait until after we leave the hospital. That's fine. I can have as many hoagies as I want that week.

What I am looking forward to: I'm still looking forward to labor. I'm sure my feelings will change rapidly when labor actually starts, but for now I'm excited. I think I feel cheated out of the surprise pregnancy and surprising Seth with a positive test business. I can't wait until something happens and I get to tell Seth that it's time to go, that it's time to meet our son. 

Milestones: 37 weeks!! Baby E is no longer considered pre-term. His lungs could still do some maturing and he may or may not be ready to eat on his own, but otherwise he should be good to go at this point!

Showing yet: Duh. You know, everyone always talks about how you can't see your feet at the end. That's bullshit - you can, you just have to lean forward a little bit. You know what you can't see? Your crotch. It's impossible. I mean, I don't really need to see it but being unable to is a strange feeling. Just in case you were wondering about that, now you know. 

35 weeks - FIVE!!

How far along: 35 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: FIVE weeks until my EDD!! Only 35 days! 

Baby is the size of a: Coconut! At our growth scan, they estimated that the baby was about 5 lbs, 6 oz (+ or - 13 oz). I think he's on the bigger side of that range. He feels giant to me, but I guess I don't really have anything to judge that against.

Physical symptoms:  The pressure on my bladder has really increased and I have to pee all the time. More heartburn. 

Mood: Great!   

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Still +20, doctor said it was perfect though.

Maternity clothes: Yes, except my pants. My yoga pants are still glorious.     

Sleep: Still good. I'm waking up to pee more often but when I'm sleeping, I'm sleeping well. I hit the third tri sleep jackpot I think. Second tri was so much worse for me.

Best moment of the week: Seeing Baby at the growth scan on Monday! 

Movement: He's wild and completely taking up all of the available space.

Food cravings/aversions: French fries.

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Not really. BH were a bit more common again.

What I miss: Feeling like I can breathe normally.

What I am looking forward to: NBR: Baking Christmas cookies this week. 

Milestones:  Not a milestone but people seem to love the 35/35 point (35 weeks with 35 days to go) so -yay!!

Showing yet: Yep. I'm lazy and just re-sharing my HDBD picture from this past Wednesday (34w3d). Also, I got measured for nursing bras this week. I am skeptical, but the woman said I was a 34D. A "D"! Those are adult boobs. 

34 weeks

How far along: 34 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: 6 weeks (ahh!!!)/42 days

Baby is the size of a: Butternut squash. He feels giant.

Physical symptoms: Super uncomfortable. Either baby is getting so big that he's taking up my whole torso or he's wedged up towards my chest. Sitting down is painful.   

Mood: Mostly good, but I'm getting easily frustrated when I can't do things I normally do.   

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  About +20 lbs. Though according to the stranger that did a full inspection of my body the other day, it looks like I only gained 10. Thanks?

Maternity clothes: Tops yes, but I've been living in my new non-maternity yoga pants. I have four pairs now.     

Sleep: Still pretty good so I guess that's a fair trade for being so uncomfortable during the day. I'll take it.

Best moment of the week: We picked a name! I'm not going to share it on here because I don't use our real names here. I don't want this blog to show up if someone Googles us. Because people are totally Googling us all the time.

Movement: OMFG. The alien belly was out of control last night. Seth and I were half screaming, half laughing at it. Then laughing made the baby move more. I absolutely love seeing and feeling him move because I was afraid I'd never experience this...but it does freak me out a bit.

Food cravings/aversions: Still french fries. If I could eat french fries for every meal, I would.

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Nope. I don't even notice BH that often, but maybe I'm just getting used to them.

What I miss: Sitting and bending over without pain.

What I am looking forward to: We have another growth scan on Tuesday and it turns out Seth will be able to go after all!

Milestones: 34 weeks today! Baby could arrive at any time. If I go into labor, they're not going to stop me! Hopefully he hangs out in there for a few more weeks though.

Showing yet: Yes. I noticed that I've gained most of my non-belly weight on my lower body. I don't recognize my legs. My ass looks big(ger) too, but to be honest I wouldn't mind if that hangs around after baby is born. 

33 weeks

How far along: 33 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: 7 weeks/49 days - less than 50!

Baby is the size of a: Durian fruit. Oh right, one of those. Baby is keeping his eyes open now and continuing to practice breathing and swallowing. And still getting hiccups all the time!

Physical symptoms: General discomfort and heartburn/reflux. Is that the same thing? I thought I've had heartburn before but that doesn't even compare to what I've been getting lately. Time to give up the buffalo chicken :(

Mood: Fine   

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Did you really think I would check my weight the weekend after Thanksgiving? All I know is that my meal was delicious and I ate leftovers for days. There might have been a bacon cheeseburger the night before Thanksgiving too. Oops.

Maternity clothes: Mostly, except for my new favorite yoga pants which are regular.      

Sleep: Not too bad except for last night's reflux incident. I think I'm going to try sleeping in a sitting position to avoid that.

Best moment of the week: Thanksgiving was great! It was so nice to spend time alone with Seth and my pups.

Movement: It feels like he's trying to find an escape route. He's moving in every possible direction at once which is fun.

Food cravings/aversions: French fries. Why are carbs so fucking delicious??

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Nope

What I miss: Beer looked really good this week.

What I am looking forward to: Reaching 34 weeks, growth scan next week and my parents visiting in two weeks!

Milestones: Next one is 34 weeks, according to me.

Showing yet: Yes. 

32 weeks

How far along: 32 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: 8 weeks/56 more days (we're in the 50's?!?)

Baby is the size of a: Squash. He's pretty well-developed at this point and will start putting on more and more weight as the weeks go by.

Physical symptoms: Nothing too crazy. I'm still having lower back pain and I expect that will continue from here on out.   

Mood: Not as bad as last week, but I still had some moments.  

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Forgot to check.

Maternity clothes: Yep     

Sleep: Pretty good this week! The only problem is that Binks and Bear don't understand weekends. Seth gets up early to walk them before work during the week, so they think they're supposed to wake up early every day.

Best moment of the week: Seth's lab is officially closed for the holidays! Also, his family has agreed to fly to the US to spend Christmas here with us. It will be the first time his whole family is together in over 5 years so that's nice.

Movement: No changes except that it sometimes feels like he's trying to escape out of my left side or bust through my crotch. Not yet, Bud.

Food cravings/aversions: I'm craving soda and french fries again. I don't think I would mind having a bacon cheeseburger for every meal either.

Sex: Still a boy

Labor signs: Nope

What I miss: Cold hoagies and taking my pants off without pain (I got stuck last night while Seth was out getting dinner. Tip - if you lay on your side in bed, it's easier to reach down and pull them off.)

What I am looking forward to: 34 weeks

Milestones: I read that babies born after 32 weeks have a 95% chance of surviving, typically without any long-term health problems so that's comforting.

Showing yet: Yes. 

31 weeks

How far along: 31 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: 9 weeks (woohoo single digits)/62 days

Baby is the size of a: Pineapple!  All five of his senses are working and his brain is becoming more developed.

Physical symptoms:  A little bit of heartburn, RLP and lower back pain. Nothing terrible. Oh yeah and blood in my pee without a UTI. And tired. So so tired. 

Mood: Completely unstable. This was not my week. On Monday, I cried (a lot) when I had to leave my dogs home alone for the first time after we had a fire hazard at the house. Then I cried when I raced home to check on them and realized that my roommate was staying home. Then I cried just because. On Wednesday, I started peeing blood again. Friday I found out that I didn't have a UTI so I'll need to see a specialist to figure that shit out. Saturday I cried because the sandwich place wouldn't put my ham on the side so I could heat it up even though they did it last time. At least pregnancy hormones don't make me ragey. Well, I was a lit bit ragey at the sandwich place. Just cut the ham, pretend you're putting it on the roll and then move it to the side a little bit. Why is that not allowed?

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  +17 lbs

Maternity clothes: Yep. I bought the cutest thermals for the holiday season.      

Sleep: Same, good. Still peeing all night, but sleeping okay in between.

Best moment of the week: Since last week was not my week, I'm stealing a moment from this week. It looks like Seth might have off for 3-4 weeks around the holidays! He has an education-based job, but the university is only closed for four days. However, he found out today that his lab will be closed from 12/15 to 1/5. So it's unconfirmed, but there's a good chance he can spend more time at home! I'm really happy. Obviously, I'm thrilled that we're having a baby but I'm getting a little emotional about the fact that we only have two months of "just us" time left. I believe that it will be better with three of us, but it will still be different.

Movement: Yep. Baby tried to break out of my left side last night.

Food cravings/aversions: There are 8 boxes of cereal in the pantry right now.

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Nope

What I miss: I miss when my boobs didn't sit on my belly and squish my lungs.

What I am looking forward to: Thanksgiving and the 34 week growth scan

Milestones: 34 weeks. My doctor (all doctors?) will not try to stop labor starting at 34 weeks so that feels like a big deal.

Showing yet: Yes. I usually sleep in a t-shirt and none of my regular t-shirts fit anymore.

30 weeks!!

I can't believe we're at the three-quarter mark. 75% sounds so close to finished. But then, 25% still sounds like a lot of time left. It still seems like we have plenty of time to finish getting ready. It sounds like I still have a lot of time to expand and get very uncomfortable. Assuming we go at least the full 40 weeks, of course.


How far along: 30 weeks 

Countdown to EDD: 10 weeks/70 days

Baby is the size of a: Cucumber. Baby is still practicing his breathing skills. I felt hiccups for the first time this week!

Physical symptoms: Heartburn (my own fault, thanks buffalo chicken), pretty intense RLP and lower back pain on my right side. I realized I stand with all of my weight on my right foot and I need to stop. My belly is getting too heavy for that.   

Mood: Mostly good

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Enough

Maternity clothes: Nothing new. I did buy some new non-maternity yoga pants though. My old ones were OLD. I think I'll pack them in my hospital bag since they've been on their way out for years.     

Sleep: Not bad. I don't sleep through the night, but I sleep without terrible pain.

Best moment of the week: We finished ordering our cloth diaper stash! I'm so pumped for them to get here.

Movement: It's different all of a sudden. I still get kicks and pokes, but now I really feel his whole body moving. Sometimes he'll lean up against the outside and I can see him and feel him sitting there. It makes my stomach look misshapen.

Food cravings/aversions: French fries and Boston creme donuts, not necessarily together but I probably wouldn't say no.

Sex: Boy

Labor signs: Tons of BH contractions, thankfully nothing else

What I miss: Beer and cold turkey hoagies

What I am looking forward to: Getting our cloth diapers, finishing up the nursery, Thanksgiving, the end of the semester...

Milestones: Today! 30 weeks sounds like a big deal. The next big number will be our EDD!

Showing yet: I squeezed myself into a non-maternity tank to make another comparison photo. I'm pretty sure that I felt "puffy" at 10 weeks. L.O.L. Check out my boobs too. Go on, have a look - you don't even need a magnifying glass anymore. They're just still just a B, but that's a B for "Biggest they've ever been".